Falling apart!

"Having your children with you, and having them around all the time, and growing up with them, and to love them all the time. For I have a Daughter her name is Sherry and I love her a lot, for to be with her would mean a lot to me.

For I would give the world to be with her right here and now. For she is everything to me she is my life, my hope and my world all in one. For I pray the Lord god is with her all the days of her life.

For I hope she will be with God laws, and grows to love God as I do. For if she lives with God and pray for what she needs, God will give it to her."

******************************************************************

I found that document in my dad's papers today. You don't know how I cried and cried. I have always struggled with knowing weather or not my dad loved me. WOW this is just so much, I miss him so very much! The photo above is my dad & me when I was 3 days old (April 9, 1972). Look at his face... he looks like he is in love with me. That makes me so happy and yet so sad because he couldn't share this love with me while he was alive!!! I'll be gone again tomorrow to finish some more cleaning at dad's house. Thanks for your prayers!

Funeral Services.

I want to thank each of you for your comments, love, encouragements & sympothy. Please visit the funeral home's website http://expressionstributes.com/modules/obit_module_lite.php?id=5286&ck=1203292990

My Daddy Passed Away

February 16, 2008 at about 20 minutes to twelve my daddy passed away. Two months and 10 days after my mom.

We went up to the hospital on Friday morning and we didn't leave until today after 1 PM, after we said our goodbyes. I miss my daddy sooooo much. What am I going to do without him around? The funeral will probley be Tuesday or Wednesday. I wont be around for a couple of days.

New Layout

Credits: Royanna Fritschmann

My biggest lesson in life came from...

Conquering my fears... Fear destroys Faith! Faith in myself, faith in God, faith in others... when I let fear over take me and I listen to what others say to me negative I get stressed out. What helps me is to stop "thinking" on my fears, because when I am afraid of whatever is coming against me and I think on that then it comes to pass. I have learned to have a positive mental attitude.

This photo is of me October 1982; I love horses so much, but I remember standing there totally in fear, I thought this phillie was going to freak out on me and hurt me...but she didn't and I am so glad that I have this beautiful photo of me & this beautiful horse.

A time I want to experience again...

Lately I have been looking through a lot of my childhood photos. This is photo is from 1977 or 1978. I was 5 or 6 years old. I would love to go back and relive my childhood, okay so I would like to not to go through the trauma of my childhood. But I wish that I could remember the things that happened more clearer. I really do wish that when I was first married, as an adult, that I had better relationships with my mom & dad, my grandparents, and my siblings... now that my grandparents have past away and my mother too, it really has hit me hard that I need to treasure every moment I have with my loved ones.

So my advice to all of you... Remember...Hold on tight to the ones you Love!

I've been tagged! :)

By my online blogging friends Maureen & Sarah on their blogs. Here I go with my tag

*You must post the rules before you give your answers.
*You must list one fact about yourself for each letter of your middle name.
*Each fact must begin with that letter.
*If you don't have a middle name, just use your maiden name.
*After you've been tagged, you need to up-date your blog with your middle name and answers.
*At the end of your post, you need to tag one person for each letter of your middle name.

(Be sure to leave them a comment telling them they've been tagged and need to read your blog for details).

L~ Loving, I love with a passion!
Y~ Youthful, at least I act young... LOL
N~ and my son says that I am NOBLE!!
N~ he also says that I am NICE!! (isn't he adorable!!)

Let's see now I need to tag four people as there are four letters to my middle name
Lynn, Toni, Noelia, & Aimeslee... Hope you guys have fun!!

Scrapping the Music Challenge...

I really love Scrapping the Music challenge, This is me as a baby, it's my hospital photo. :)

Credits: Doodles by Princess Lala & Everything else by Raspberry Road

Some new Layouts... :)

Hello guys I am starting a new challenge... 360 Degrees of Scrapbooking, with Divine Digital, I had so much fun with the 40 days of scrapping purpose, and got 40 layouts done. With this challenge, if I get it done, I get get 60 layouts done. :)

Day 1: Come full circle with me

Journaling: "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. -Mark Twain"

My 5 goals...

1. Scrap out of my comfort zone!
2. Scrap things I normally would not scrap
3. Enjoy scrapbooking again!
4. Learn from others.
5. Complete 60 layouts!

Credits: Pinapple Plantation's Lumberjack Mini Kit.

**************************************************************************

Day 2: Notes from me!

Journaling: "Listen more, Talk less, Laugh all you can, Eat healthy, Exercise, even if it’s just your mind!, Love often, Life is fragile... handle with prayer!"

Credits: Paper & Alpha letters by Pinapple Plantation's Butterfly Garden Freebie, Journal Box by Royanna Fritschmann in the 40 days of scrapping purpose, and the butterfly on journal box and the frame around photo by Raspberry Road's Faded Memories Elements.

*************************************************************

Hey all, I just talked to my dad and he sounds soooo very good!! He is having a hard time with walking and moving, but that might take a long time. Thanks for your continued prayers.

....pressed on every side....

This is my new favorite song... I need this more than I even know. Here are the lyrics...

"Never Gonna Stop" by Tommy Walker

For Your beauty that's been shown
For Your mysteries unknown
For the miracles we've seen
We praise You Lord
For the story of Your love
For the wonder of Your blood
How it makes the sinner clean
Someone like me

So I'm never gonna stop
Never gonna stop
Lifting up my hand to You
Lifting up my heart

When the last day comes and goes
And time will be no more
I'll be praising You
No I'll never let it end
I'll just begin it all again
Shouts of thankfulness an love
I'm always gonna give
A thousand years from now
Before Your throne of grace and pow'r
I'll be praising You
Praising You

Though pressed on every side
With troubles and fears so near me
And should the whole wide world deny You
I'll just make it louder
Shout Your name on high

I'll be praising
I'll be praising You

*********************************************************

Hey guys... okay now for a real blog entry. WOW, my week has been crazy! I can't really talk about it, but just know that I am stressed and I want a cigerette!! I'm not gonna fall back into that trap, but the WANT is there and I am struggling with it.

My dad is doing better, every day getting a little better. He got up Saturday and walked in the hall way!! YIPEE!! And he is doing some physical therapy, that is really building his strength up. And the greatest news... he isn't talking about dying or giving up anymore!!! I just talked to him and they had just given him a pain pill, so he was a little groggy and out of it.

I want to Thank you all for your prayers and encouragment!!